Why Society Judges Suicidal Men Differently – And Why That Needs to Change
Introduction: The Double Standard in Suicide Awareness
Society claims to care about mental health, yet when it comes to male suicide, there is a clear and disturbing double standard. While suicide prevention efforts tend to focus on women and youth, the staggering number of men dying by suicide is often dismissed as a personal failure rather than a public health crisis.
Men account for over 80% of all suicide deaths globally, yet their struggles are routinely overlooked or minimized. Instead of compassion, suicidal men are often met with blame, ridicule, or indifference. This stark contrast in how male suicide is perceived versus female suicide has dire consequences.
This blog explores why society judges suicidal men differently, the root causes of this bias, and why we must change the narrative before more lives are lost.
1. The Gendered Narrative of Suicide
A. How Society Responds to Male vs. Female Suicide
- When a woman dies by suicide, she is often portrayed as a victim of circumstance, someone who was failed by the system.
- When a man dies by suicide, it is often framed as an act of weakness, selfishness, or irresponsibility (Seidler et al., 2021).
- Suicide prevention campaigns overwhelmingly focus on women and young people, despite men being the highest-risk group (CDC, 2023).
- High-profile cases of female suicide receive widespread media sympathy, while male suicides are largely ignored unless tied to extreme circumstances.
B. The “Toxic Masculinity” Excuse
- Instead of addressing the root causes of male suicide, many blame masculinity itself, arguing that men’s reluctance to seek help is their own fault.
- The modern push to pathologize masculinity frames traditional male traits like resilience, stoicism, and self-reliance as mental health liabilities rather than strengths (Mahalik et al., 2019).
- Men are told to “open up” and be vulnerable, but when they do, their pain is often dismissed, ridiculed, or weaponized against them.
2. Why Society Struggles to Empathize with Suicidal Men
A. The Expectation That Men Must Always “Handle It”
- From childhood, men are conditioned to believe that their emotions are a burden and that they should “man up” rather than seek help.
- Unlike women, who are encouraged to express vulnerability, men are expected to be “problem solvers,” making them less likely to receive emotional support when struggling (Mahalik et al., 2019).
- The failure to meet unrealistic societal expectations—whether financial, career-based, or familial—often leads men to internalize shame, worsening depression.
B. The Lack of Public Advocacy for Male Suicide Prevention
- Feminist mental health advocacy has secured billions in funding for women’s mental health, while men’s mental health initiatives remain underfunded and underrepresented (Kilmartin, 2020).
- Government policies rarely address male suicide as a unique crisis, instead lumping it into generalized “mental health awareness” campaigns that fail to reach men effectively.
- Men are far less likely to be encouraged to seek therapy or psychiatric help, further reinforcing the cycle of neglect (Seidler et al., 2021).
C. The Weaponization of Male Vulnerability
- Men who openly express suicidal thoughts are often met with apathy or judgment, especially in professional or legal settings.
- In family court, men’s mental health struggles are often used against them in custody battles, reinforcing the fear that vulnerability makes them unfit fathers.
- Men who discuss their depression with partners risk being seen as weak, which can lead to further relationship breakdown and emotional isolation (Lisak, 1994).
3. The Deadly Consequences of Ignoring Male Suicide
A. The Suicide Crisis Among Middle-Aged and Older Men
- Men aged 45-64 have the highest suicide rates of any demographic (CDC, 2023), yet little attention is paid to this group in mental health advocacy.
- Many of these men are struggling with job loss, financial stress, divorce, or chronic health issues, all of which are significant suicide risk factors (Qin et al., 2000).
- Without targeted interventions, these numbers will only continue to rise.
B. The Role of Financial and Legal Struggles in Male Suicide
- Divorced men are nearly 3 times more likely to die by suicide than married men (Brinig & Allen, 2000).
- Men disproportionately face financial ruin due to biased divorce settlements and alimony laws, further increasing the risk of despair and self-harm.
- Unemployment increases male suicide risk by 2-3 times, yet society continues to ignore the link between economic hardship and men’s mental health (OECD, 2022).
4. How We Can Change the Conversation About Male Suicide
A. Acknowledge That Male Suicide Is a Crisis
- The first step in addressing male suicide is recognizing that it is a distinct and urgent crisis that requires specific attention.
- Men need mental health services tailored to their needs, including action-oriented therapy and male-friendly support groups (Shapiro, 2018).
- Suicide prevention campaigns must stop prioritizing political correctness over actual at-risk demographics.
B. Stop Shaming Men for Their Pain
- Men are not “weak” for struggling with suicidal thoughts—they are human, and their suffering is just as real as anyone else’s.
- Encouraging men to speak out about their struggles is pointless if society continues to dismiss or mock them when they do.
- Mental health resources must be designed in a way that respects and supports traditional masculinity rather than trying to dismantle it.
C. Fund and Promote Male-Specific Mental Health Services
- Governments and nonprofits must allocate proper funding to male-focused suicide prevention efforts.
- Workplace and community-based mental health programs tailored to men should be developed and expanded (Movember Foundation, 2023).
- Financial and legal advocacy for men facing divorce, unemployment, or other crises must be prioritized.
D. Change the Media Narrative About Male Suicide
- The media must stop perpetuating the idea that male depression is a personal failure rather than a systemic issue.
- Suicide prevention campaigns should include real stories of men overcoming struggles, rather than only focusing on women’s mental health.
- More male public figures must openly discuss their struggles, showing that mental health challenges do not make men “lesser” in any way.
Conclusion: A Call for Real Change
The way society treats suicidal men is unacceptable. Men are not disposable. Their struggles deserve recognition, compassion, and real solutions.
Until we stop judging male suicide differently, men will continue to suffer in silence—until they can’t anymore.
If you or someone you know is struggling, real help is available. Reach out before it’s too late.
Resources for Male Suicide Prevention
📞 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (U.S.) – Call or Text 988
📞 Samaritans (UK) – 116 123
📞 Lifeline Australia – 13 11 14
Men deserve to live. Society must start acting like it.